Not Even Myself Horse Head

I can't picture my own face with a smile
And it's been like this for a while
When the time comes to make a choice
I can not hear the options
It's hard to hear them over the sound of your own voice

So cross my heart
And slit my wrists
I don't think that love exists
And I can't trust no one
Not even myself
So black my eyes
Tell me lies
Couldn't believe them if I tried
I can't trust nobody
Not even my own body

Not a day goes by where I don't miss you
I just hate myself, I'd never diss you
And I don't think I can take you back
No, I would not dare risk that
Cause losing you is just like losing part of myself

When the time comes to make a choice
I can not hear the options
It's hard to hear them over the sound of your own voice