Luckiest Loser Bowling for Soup

[Verse 1]
Man, you're really one heck of a guy
Best friends since junior high
You showed me Playboy for the very first time, that was rad
We saw Bon Jovi, we sat in the front row
I pierced your ear right before the show
We stole your brother's beer and he didn't know, woah-oh

[Pre-Chorus]
Woah
Your new girlfriend is a son of a gun
Did you fall in love or did you just wanna get some?
(Just wanna get some?)

[Chorus]
That girl is crazy, she's a loco-motion
I know you know she used to be my girl
You better run for cover 'cause she's ticking like a time bomb (Ticking like a time bomb)
And did I mention that you both suck dot com?
And now you're stuck with her
Like Mellencamp is stuck with Cougar
I guess that make me the luckiest loser

[Verse 2]
I met her at a keger passed out on the yard
Getting in her pants wasn't really that hard
Six months later she crashed my car, that was rad
She's got a glow from her spray-on tan
Marilyn Manson is her favorite band
I really think she might worship Satan, not a fan