No Compute Funkadelic

Ah, I awakened from a wet dream in which I was restless
My imagination could no longer take me there
So I slid into my copping haberdashery
And gave into the original Jones: sex

Now, my sexy Jones was below sea level
The hornies occupied my being
I was at that stage where most men would say
"Hey ho', it's your life or your lay."
But I was cooler than that

She said, "No compute."

I spotted a lady who was also on the prowl
I could tell by her makeup, plus the scent was there
So I sashayed over to her, and, ah, spoke of my plan
She screamed and said, "Are you asking to make love to me?"
I said, "Is pig pussy pork?
Or are you gonna play hard
After all the trouble you went through to get chosen?"
She said, ah, "No compute."

Finally, she said, ah, "I could, ah, probably go for what you're talking about
But it's really about my birth control pill."
I said, "All looks are not alike, all holes are not a crack
When in doubt, vamp
Or at least ad-lib
And of course you know that spit don't make babies."
She smiled, and said, "No compute."
But I could tell that she was getting interested