Jacob Rees-Mogg Rap Roast Dan Bull

[Hook]
My God
Jacob Rees-Mogg
Check your priorities
At once
Jacob Rees-Mogg
Your punctuation policies
Are wrong
Jacob Rees-Mogg
No “and” following comma, please
What
Jacob Rees-Mogg
Is with all these frivolities?

[Verse 1]
Mr. Rees-Mogg
I understand your concerns
But I cannot tell you that I am pleased to learn
The list of words which you determine
Unacceptable and worthless
Due to the fact of their being no longer fit for purpose
You’d better check your work
‘Cause when I look at Hansard
There are countless examples of you flouting your own standards
You've too many I's yourself
What an ongoing disappointment
And thus calling to question your self appointed anointment
As the guardian and arbiter of grammatical convention
So see me after class Rees-Mogg
You’ve got yourself into detention
Whether or not it was your intention
You’ve brought attention to the boiling tension
And contentions we’re all fomenting
There’s no point in pretending we all can be friends
And it’s hard to enforce a convention in language
When language is always dissenting
It wasn’t always cemented in rules
Semantics or how things are meant to be called
The fact that language is bending is cool
Ascending through trends and transcending all
The attempts to control and restrain its application’s
A source of endless fascination
But actually, Jacob, I’ve taken a minute just to ascertain
Whether I’ve considered and have given it enough cogitation
To safely treat this linguistic oversimplification as
Just a misinterpretation deserving of floccinaucinihilipilification
Or if you’re a pillock deserving of all of this vilification