At Both Ends Loudon Wainwright III

In Paris, France you know it's ooh-la-la
They got the bottle of wine, they got the old Marais
In Dublin town they're gonna tip a few
Of that angry land's thick black brew
Lone Star has no substitute
T for Texas, Toke, and Toot

It's a shame and it's a scandal
The way he burns the candle
The way he burns the candle at both ends

Only twenty four of them in one day
You can't sleep the valuable hours away
Jailbait under twenty one
Illegal and unwholesome fun
Who needs love, who wants romance?
I wanna eat your underpants

And it's a shame and it's a scandal
The way he burns the candle
The way he burns the candle at both end

You know the boy is a rake, the boys is a roamer
The boys's strung out and the boy's hungover
There is no way the boy can disguise
The brown fingertips and the bloodshot eyes
Now the boys's in a sorry state
It even hurts to urinate