Worthless Thing Elvis Costello

[Verse 1]
How many times can you jump out of the cupboard
Before someone gets suspicious or someone gets discovered
You can live forever in a split second of fame
Come on down, the price is right, what's your name?
While a crocodile makes good shoes and a dog may change his coat
I can't change what's written on your face tonight and I quote

[Chorus]
Oh I wish you could see
Quite how much you could mean to me
You worthless thing
If you were ten feet taller and almost handsome
I might pay this king's ransom
You worthless thing

[Verse 2]
They commit blue murder along Union Avenue
Then they sell you souvenir matches
Nightclubs full of grave robbers from Memphis, Tennessee
And Las Vegas body snatchers
And he's carrying a warning, can't you see how his eyes glint?
Keep your bloody hands off my life, your affectionate fingerprint

[Chorus]
Oh I wish you could see
Quite how much you could mean to me
You worthless thing
If you were ten feet taller and almost handsome
I might pay this king's ransom
You worthless thing