The Man Upstairs Voltaire

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The guy upstairs is such a freak
For five years now I've had a leak
What does he do up there?
All day long he "sleeps all day,"
Then he goes out and comes home
In the most intoxicated way
As far as I can tell, he juggles bowling balls
But he's not good at it
He moves his furniture then at six am
He pulls out the vacuum cleaner
To suck his room
The guy downstairs is also crazy
He spent some time in an institute
It did him not much good
He's off his medication
And he starts screaming
"Virgin Mary, you fucking alien!"
According to him Jesus Christ smokes crack
And other sundry things
But it's the man upstairs who pulls the strings
Won't let me sleep

Please, kill that man upstairs
If you ever loved me, you'll do this one thing
Won't you sweetheart?
Please murder that man upstairs
If you want to be my friend
You'll have to prove you mean it