Thy Damnation Slumbereth Not Half Man Half Biscuit

I'm gonna grab myself an industry insider mask and blag my way
Into the after show
I wanna get in amongst the baying hordes of resting actors
Who've just got back from visiting Nairobi slums for Comic Relief
And now they're going to spend the next six weeks sitting in the vestibule
Waiting for the Farm Foods phone call
The Farm Foods phone call

I'm going to be apprehended by some mandatory galoot with a handheld camera
Who will point it in my face and say: "Who are you, and what do you do?"
And I'll say "I'm a counterblast to Agnosticism, how do you do"
And he'll go away immediately

I wanna meet Howard Marks if I can but they say that I can't
I need four different wrist bands

Follow me oh follow
Down to the hollow
And there we will wallow

There's a BritPop refugee
Walking up to me
And his face is hollow from seasons of disappointment
And he starts blathering on about his latest project
Already being dismissed by the most unlikeliest of cable stations
It's a dot com sitcom
About a hip hop chip shop