Hello Tim Minchin

Hello
Welcome to our show
I'm glad that you could come
We're gonna have a hoot
We're gonna have some fun

Sit back
Put your feet up and relax
I hope you've had a drink or three
The more you've drunk
The better I will be

And if you have a mobile phone
Please turn it off
[Extended pause]
Thank you
And if you have Tourette's syndrome
Just do whatever it is you people do
And if you are offended by strong language or blasphemy
Maybe you should chuff off home
Cause it's only gonna get worse
Only gonna get worse
Only gonna get worse
From now on
(Cunt)