Suddenly New Zealand Fascinating Aida

When you're lying awake
With a dismal headache
And repose is tabooed by anxiety
It is hardly surprising
If you're agonising
Considering modern society;
There are terrible dangers
From horrible strangers
Whose every intention is criminal;
There are counterfeit healers
And Ecstasy dealers
Who thrive 'cause policing is minimal;
We've got under-age nooky
And lads playing hooky
Who lurk around corners to mug us;
And there's Proddies and Papists
And robbers and rapists
With tabs of Rohypnol to drug us;
On the street you take fright
At the menacing sight
Of graffiti in French and Cyrillic;
And behind curtains drawn
People downloading porn
Are indulging in tastes paedophilic;
Though the threats are tremendous
The law won't defend us
And don't even think of resistance;
So before it's too late
Let us all emigrate
To a very much better existence...