Count Your Blessings Victoria Wood

When I'm feeling lousy
When lousy's what I feel
I give myself a lecture
I do myself a deal
I sing this little number
I tra-la-la this verse
I say, however lousy
Things could be worse

I could be on safari getting trampled by a rhino
I could be in my bare feet stood on icy lino
I could be dying
I could be dead
Could be 6 foot 8
And keep banging my head
I could!

I could be an early Christian being eaten by a lion
I could be a little crumple getting flattened by an iron
I could have mumps
I could have flu
I could be a giant panda
And have to eat bamboo
I could!

I could be nervous policeman with a faulty walkie-talkie
I could be a lorry driver who hates the taste of Yorkie
I could have dry skin
I could have split ends
I could be a deep sea diver
Having trouble with the bends
I could, I could
And it would not be good