To Fall Asleep Holding Absence

[Intro]
Bittersweet remedy, heal me
I've tried to be everything you need of me

[Verse 1]
I'm not holding my breath, I know that ruin merely rests
I can feel it pressed against my chest
Like a virus, I've tried to find us, a way out of this hole
With my hands pressed against my nose
I'm trying to be holy, but I still don't feel whole
I'm trying to be holy, but I still don't feel whole

[Chorus]
Can't you see that it's haunting me, every night when I try to sleep?
I'm so weak
Burdened by the epiphany that misery's periphery won't let me be

[Verse 2]
The grass is always greener when you live in black and white
I try to close my eyes, imagine everything's alright
But honey like an arrow, sewn into a quiver
It's in my marrow, it's in my liver
You watch me wilt away like a flower without rain
There's nothing you can do, honey, please just look away

I am nailed to this cross, and I must carry it alone
I'd ask you to hold my hands, but they're worn to the bone