
The Ignominious Demise of Dr. Pilchard The Mechanisms
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[Spoken: Dr. Pilchard]
“Gunpowder Tim and Ashes O’Reilly, laid low by brute force alone. With Nastya succumbing to a computer virus. Drumbot Brian was marched to the brig at gunpoint. Ivy was enticed there by the prospect of a book fair. Raphaella la Cognizi chloroformed in her lab. The Toy Soldier caved into peer pressure. Jonny… caved into octokitten pressure. And as for Marius… I just asked him nicely."
[Dr. Pilchard] “Are we sitting comfortably?”
[Jonny d'Ville] “No.”
[Dr. Pilchard] “Good. Then I’ll begin."
[Verse 1: Dr. Pilchard]
Finally I've got you trapped in here with me
Your ship is seized, now you're on your knees
You're overpowered, within the hour
You'll be inside my laboratory
[Chorus: Dr. Pilchard]
Life, life, eternity!
This is the gift you'll give to me
True immortality
All of your secrets soon I'll see
[Jonny d'Ville] “You know I must admit I’m impressed. I don’t remember the last time anyone managed to incapacitate us all like this
[Gunpowder Tim] “Wasn’t it that aristocratic one with all the knives?”
[Jonny d'Ville] “Ahh, the Marquis de All the Knives… Now there was a worthy foe."
[Verse 2: Dr. Pilchard]
Soon there'll be nothing money cannot buy
They'll trade their wealth for eternal life
The strife of man since the world began
Is to conquer death, and that’s my plan
“Gunpowder Tim and Ashes O’Reilly, laid low by brute force alone. With Nastya succumbing to a computer virus. Drumbot Brian was marched to the brig at gunpoint. Ivy was enticed there by the prospect of a book fair. Raphaella la Cognizi chloroformed in her lab. The Toy Soldier caved into peer pressure. Jonny… caved into octokitten pressure. And as for Marius… I just asked him nicely."
[Dr. Pilchard] “Are we sitting comfortably?”
[Jonny d'Ville] “No.”
[Dr. Pilchard] “Good. Then I’ll begin."
[Verse 1: Dr. Pilchard]
Finally I've got you trapped in here with me
Your ship is seized, now you're on your knees
You're overpowered, within the hour
You'll be inside my laboratory
[Chorus: Dr. Pilchard]
Life, life, eternity!
This is the gift you'll give to me
True immortality
All of your secrets soon I'll see
[Jonny d'Ville] “You know I must admit I’m impressed. I don’t remember the last time anyone managed to incapacitate us all like this
[Gunpowder Tim] “Wasn’t it that aristocratic one with all the knives?”
[Jonny d'Ville] “Ahh, the Marquis de All the Knives… Now there was a worthy foe."
[Verse 2: Dr. Pilchard]
Soon there'll be nothing money cannot buy
They'll trade their wealth for eternal life
The strife of man since the world began
Is to conquer death, and that’s my plan
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