Liars’ Bar The Beautiful South

[Intro]
Oh, yeah...

[Verse 1]
Well, sitting in a bar alone where no-one knows your name
Is like laying in a graveyard wide awake
You're scared that if you cough or yawn you might wake up the dead
So pretend to read a paper or just drink instead

I'm a stand-up comedian, but I'd sit down if I could
The world just seems to want folk like me to stand
And the punch-lines seem to disappear like clouds across the sky
And the laughter could be real or could be canned

[Chorus]
Rum by the kettle drum, whiskey by the jar
At Liar's Bar...

[Verse 2]
Well, living with a lying man could never really hurt
But living with a drunk one, no-one deserves
And you're looking for your husband, you're not sure he's still alive
Don't bother with the cemetery, he'll be down at Liar's Dive

I'm a travelling businessman, I just stopped in for one drink
You'll find that I'm not like the other men
Their noses are red, whilst mine is only pink
And they didn't choose their drink, their drink chose them