Two-Handed Handshake The Hold Steady

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His two handed handshake
Says he's so glad to meet you
His one silver earring
Says he parties on weekends

He churns through the channels
When he's watching the TV
He recites lines from movies
When he's trying to be funny

Guys, it's like we're not even trying

Yeah, she danced with that one guy
She must know we're watching
It seems like less people
Than were here just last weekend

She's still pretty pissed
About her ex's new trick
There were stares
And glares and names

Girls, you know you're not really helping

I don't think that you'll find love
In some bathroom at some club
I know some kids who didn't come back