Year 2030
Ted: OK, where was I? It was June 2006 and life had just taken an unexpected turn.
Ted's daughter:Can't you just skip ahead to the part where you meet Mom? I feel you've been talking for like a year
Ted: Honey, all this stuff I'm telling you is important. It's all part of the story.
Ted's son: Can I go to the bathroom?
Ted: No. The summer of 2006 was both wonderful and awful. For me, it started out great. (In 2006, Ted and Robin are kissing after the rain dance) In fact, day one was amazing. I'd finally gotten together with Robin. But while I'd been off having one of the best nights of my life, your Uncle Marshall had been having one of the worst nights of his (Ted finds Marshall on their stairs, holding in his hand Lily's engagement ring).
Year 2006 (Before Ted arrives, Marshall and Lily are in the apartment, arguing)
Marshall: So that's it? We're breaking up?
Lily: Marshall, I'm sorry. I just... I just need to go to San Francisco and do this art program and figure out who I am outside of us. And the only way that I can do that is if we don't talk for a while.
Marshall: For a while? Try never, OK? You walk out that door and we're done. You're never gonna hear my voice again.
Later, Ted joined Marshall.
Marshall: I should call her.
Ted: No! No! If you call her, when she asked you not to, you're just gonna look weak and you're gonna regret it. Now, listen. Whenever you feel like calling her, you come find me first... and I will punch you in the face.
Marshall: You're a good friend Ted.
(Robin arrives.)
Robin: Hey! So, did you hear the big news?
Ted: You mean how Lily and Marshall broke up and Lily is gone and nothing else even remotely important happened last night? Yeah, I think he knows.
Robin: Oh my god! I... I'm so sorry. What happened?
Marshall: Well, she left. And I don't even know if she's coming back.
(Barney arrives.)
Barney: I didn't get your message until I woke up. Bro, I am so sorry.
Marshall: Thanks.
Barney: I know it must be tough. But are you ready to hear something that will not only make you feel better but will actively excite you?
Marshall: Sure.
Barney: For the first time ever, the three of us are single at the same time. I've dreamed about this day boys and it's going to be legendary! Together, we will own this city. Any time, a girl wants to get back at her ex-boyfriend, we'll be there. Any time a girl wants to solve her father issues through promiscuity and binge-drinking, we will be there. Any time a bachelorette party drives through the city in a limo sticking their heads out, shouting "What's up New York?" we will be what is up New York! Gentlemen, we are about to embark on... (While he's speaking, Barney looks at Ted and then at Robin). Oh man, you guys did it, didn't you?!
Ted: OK, where was I? It was June 2006 and life had just taken an unexpected turn.
Ted's daughter:Can't you just skip ahead to the part where you meet Mom? I feel you've been talking for like a year
Ted: Honey, all this stuff I'm telling you is important. It's all part of the story.
Ted's son: Can I go to the bathroom?
Ted: No. The summer of 2006 was both wonderful and awful. For me, it started out great. (In 2006, Ted and Robin are kissing after the rain dance) In fact, day one was amazing. I'd finally gotten together with Robin. But while I'd been off having one of the best nights of my life, your Uncle Marshall had been having one of the worst nights of his (Ted finds Marshall on their stairs, holding in his hand Lily's engagement ring).
Year 2006 (Before Ted arrives, Marshall and Lily are in the apartment, arguing)
Marshall: So that's it? We're breaking up?
Lily: Marshall, I'm sorry. I just... I just need to go to San Francisco and do this art program and figure out who I am outside of us. And the only way that I can do that is if we don't talk for a while.
Marshall: For a while? Try never, OK? You walk out that door and we're done. You're never gonna hear my voice again.
Later, Ted joined Marshall.
Marshall: I should call her.
Ted: No! No! If you call her, when she asked you not to, you're just gonna look weak and you're gonna regret it. Now, listen. Whenever you feel like calling her, you come find me first... and I will punch you in the face.
Marshall: You're a good friend Ted.
(Robin arrives.)
Robin: Hey! So, did you hear the big news?
Ted: You mean how Lily and Marshall broke up and Lily is gone and nothing else even remotely important happened last night? Yeah, I think he knows.
Robin: Oh my god! I... I'm so sorry. What happened?
Marshall: Well, she left. And I don't even know if she's coming back.
(Barney arrives.)
Barney: I didn't get your message until I woke up. Bro, I am so sorry.
Marshall: Thanks.
Barney: I know it must be tough. But are you ready to hear something that will not only make you feel better but will actively excite you?
Marshall: Sure.
Barney: For the first time ever, the three of us are single at the same time. I've dreamed about this day boys and it's going to be legendary! Together, we will own this city. Any time, a girl wants to get back at her ex-boyfriend, we'll be there. Any time a girl wants to solve her father issues through promiscuity and binge-drinking, we will be there. Any time a bachelorette party drives through the city in a limo sticking their heads out, shouting "What's up New York?" we will be what is up New York! Gentlemen, we are about to embark on... (While he's speaking, Barney looks at Ted and then at Robin). Oh man, you guys did it, didn't you?!
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