I Sure Would Like a Mom Bob's Burgers (Ft. Dan Mintz, David Wain, Eugene Mirman & John Roberts)

[Intro: Tina, Gene, Courtney & Linda]
Gene, go on with your incredibly accurate accounting of what happened earlier tonight
I will
There I was, searching the universe for the Staff of Creation

Ugh! Why did I have to make the universe so huge? I can't find anything. I want that staff. I wanna have someone like a mom
You mean like me?

Wait, how'd you create her without the Staff of Creation?
I didn't. She's a vision
Ooh, vision

But if I was real, here's what I might be like

[Verse 1: Courtney & Gene]
I'd live on a diet of winе and cheese
You teach me to say thank you. And also, plеase
Manners are important, heh

[Verse 2: Courtney & Gene]
If you don't have a date I'll go with you to the prom
Oh, I sure would like to have someone like a mom
I'd do your homework when you don't wanna
You'd let me get a big iguana
As long as you take care of it