Scratch’s Lament Dana Snyder

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[Verse 1]
I never went
I stayed at home
While she was Carpe-ing the diem
I was playing on my phone
I was too afraid to go away
"Maybe next time", I would say

[Verse 2]
I played it safe
I took no chances
I had no stories
No adventures, no romances
I would make plans, but cancel or delay
"I can't make it", "Maybe next time", I would say

[Bridge]
She'd be on a surfboard
Riding on a swell
I'd be on the sofa
Eating nachos by myself
On the one hand, they were very tasty nachos
Lots of spice!
But on the othеr hand
I wasted my whole life