Chess (skit) Logic

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[Skit: Thomas, Kai & Roslyn]
E4
E5
Bishop C4
Knight C6
Queen H5
Too early to be bringing out that queen, Thomas
Knight G6
Oh no, Kai
Bitch, why you on business? I'm trying to win this game of chess
Queen F7. That's mate
Man, what the fuck, man? Man, how you get so good at chess?
When I was a little boy, my father told me about how his great-great-great grandfather Clark robbed this traincar full of gold with his gang. And during the robbery, there was a chess tournament being held in first class. It was such a cool story, I decided to learn how to play. Kai? Kai!
What? What? What?
Goddammit, dude! I'm telling a story here, what the fuck?
I heard you!
What did I just...no, you did not. What did I just say?
Grass and yaks
Shut up, Kai