Wiggly Willy Dan Bull

[Intro]
Hello!

[Verse 1]
My full name's Cheltenham D.G.L.B. Digby
My diet consists strictly of single-malt whisky
I'm particularly sesquipedalian
I've not published a single literary failure
And I'd speculate that's mainly thanks to the fact
That I don't even write books, I just rap, ha!
Trust that, I'm a distinguished linguist
Whose voice's weapon of choice is English
A rhythm wrecking rhetorician, getting recognition
For the fact that I'm swagger's dictionary definition
On first look, you're ready for a second listen
I took your sister to third-base, cherry picking
Heavy-hitting, yet with incredible erudition
It's a travesty you haven't seen me rapping on your television

[Hook]
I'm Cheltenham "Douglby" Digby
My witty words make your willy feel all wiggly
I'm Cheltenham "Douglby" Digby
If folk don't dig me, they don't know diddly

[Verse 2]
Allow the grime scene for the time being
I turn the G into a C, crime scene
I'm the nightmare to come and wreck your nice dream
I'll open up your top like a double-decker, sightseeing
I ripped the Rolex off of Wiley
And now I wear it in my jacket pocket by my tie, see?
I'm the reason that your wife's seen the dry cleaner
Imbibing my seed like Ribena
I'll livestream it, widescreen
As she lies, semen smeared on her cheeks
Like a child eating ice cream
She might need a new dress, Lewinsky
I'm going mental on your crew's set, Klaus Kinski
I'll kick your mumsy in the mimsy with an air of whimsy
Then throw her down the stairs like a slinky