I Won’t Leave My Wooden Wife for You, Sugar The United States of America

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[Verse 1]
Now listen, Baby and try to understand
That tying you is fine and whipping you is grand
Now I just can't tell you how much fun it's been
You make me feel twenty-five again

[Chorus 1]
But I can't leave my wooden wife for you, sugar
I got a split level house with a wonderful view, sugar
A couple next door who do the things we do, sugar
And every Saturday we sit around the pool

[Verse 2]
If I should meet you on the street someday
I hope you'll understand me if I look away
It isn't that I'm ashamed about you and me
But I've got to consider my morality

[Chorus 2]
And I won't leave my wooden wife for you, sugar
I got a split level house with a wonderful view, sugar
Three sweet kids and Yorkshire terrier, too, sugar
And I just couldn't stand it when you come late from school