Juanita and the Kids Ray Stevens

I got a letter from the IRS
Inviting me to be their guest at an audit
They were conducting just for me

They said, "No need to worry, probably nothing wrong
Just bring your wife and children along
We just need to clear up a small technicality."

Now the only problem with an audit is
My wife Juanita and our fourteen kids
Friends, you cannot believe the refunds they have been worth

But it was years ago that I got this idea
And I bought Juanita in the mail from Korea
She's an inflatable doll, but she came with a certificate of birth!

I was a single guy without any deductions
So I claimed Juanita, and what a reduction!
I received with her as my spouse on the taxes I pay

That worked so well that every year after that
I recorded a birth when I paid my tax
Each kid certified by Cabbage Patch, USA

(Chorus)
Oh, Juanita (Juanita)
My inflatable señorita
The IRS wants to take you and the children away (Away-yay-yay-yay)
You and Jim and Tammy, Lonnie and Bert
Farrah, Charo, Michael, and Kurt
Jan and Dean, Erline, Louise, Barbara, and Little Ray (Little Ray)