[Verse 1]
I pounded on a farmhouse lookin' for a place to stay
I was mighty, mighty tired, I'd come a long, long way
I said, "Hey, hey, in there, is there anybody home?"
I was standin' on the steps, feelin' most alone
When out comes a farmer, he must've thought that I was nuts
He immediately looked at me and stuck a gun into my guts
[Verse 2]
I fell down to my bended knees
Saying, "I dig farmers, don't shoot me, please!"
He cocked his rifle and begin to shout
"Are you that travelin' salesman that I have heard about?"
I said, "No! No! No! I'm a doctor and it's true
I'm a clean-cut kid and I been to college, too"
[Verse 3]
Then in comes his daughter whose name was Rita
She looked like she stepped out of La Dolce Vita
I immediately tried to cool it with her dad
And told him what a nice, pretty farm he had
He said, "What do doctors know about farms, pray tell?"
I said, "I's born at the bottom of a wishing well"
[Verse 4]
Well, by the dirt 'neath my nails, I guess he knew I wouldn't lie
He said "I guess you're tired," he said it kind of sly
I said, "Yes, ten thousand miles today I drove"
He said, "I got a bed for you underneath the stove
Just one condition, you can go to sleep right now
That you don’t touch my daughter and in the morning, milk the cows"
I pounded on a farmhouse lookin' for a place to stay
I was mighty, mighty tired, I'd come a long, long way
I said, "Hey, hey, in there, is there anybody home?"
I was standin' on the steps, feelin' most alone
When out comes a farmer, he must've thought that I was nuts
He immediately looked at me and stuck a gun into my guts
[Verse 2]
I fell down to my bended knees
Saying, "I dig farmers, don't shoot me, please!"
He cocked his rifle and begin to shout
"Are you that travelin' salesman that I have heard about?"
I said, "No! No! No! I'm a doctor and it's true
I'm a clean-cut kid and I been to college, too"
[Verse 3]
Then in comes his daughter whose name was Rita
She looked like she stepped out of La Dolce Vita
I immediately tried to cool it with her dad
And told him what a nice, pretty farm he had
He said, "What do doctors know about farms, pray tell?"
I said, "I's born at the bottom of a wishing well"
[Verse 4]
Well, by the dirt 'neath my nails, I guess he knew I wouldn't lie
He said "I guess you're tired," he said it kind of sly
I said, "Yes, ten thousand miles today I drove"
He said, "I got a bed for you underneath the stove
Just one condition, you can go to sleep right now
That you don’t touch my daughter and in the morning, milk the cows"
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