Bernie’s Holiday Camp The Who (Ft. Alison Dowling, Ann-Margret & Oliver Reed)

Frank:
I'm your friendly green coat
And I welcome you to Bernie's Holiday Camp
One day and you'll be happy
It's Bernie you will thank
You must be little Tommy
Well call me Uncle Frank

Welcome you too, Mrs. Walker (Tommy: Didn't know I had an Uncle Frank; I've never met him, have I?)
Here you'll always find a helping hand (Tommy: Look there, Mum, a cage of budgies! Swimming pool and donkey rides, all free!)
The camp with the extras
(I'm in chalet number eleven)
(Tommy: It's all free, Mum!) When you come to Bernie's
You might think you're in heaven

Here we have the winner, folks
Have you ever seen a lovelier pair?
What a shapely ankle
What a perfect shin
If you could feel this silken thigh
You'd know who has to win
If you could feel this silken thigh
You'd know...

Nora:
You don't know how much I've missed
To feel a man again to dance, to kiss