The Ballad of Jenny Malloy Marc Gunn

This is the story of Jenny Malloy
She was handsome rather than cute—
She went off to sea a-dressed as a boy
Till caught in the wrong birthday suit

Jenny decided when she was thirteen
That the life of a girl was a bore
So she stole her some trews and a cap and a gun
And left her dull home on the shore

She applied for a berth with Black Jack Murphy
Because she had heard he was fair
And he took her on board on the strength of her word
Never thinking to check her down there

Jenny was clever, she was never caught out
And the crew came to know her as “Tim”
They praised the brave lad for the skills that he had
Though they wondered why he didn’t swim

For years things went fine, but you can’t alter time…
And—as breasts do—hers started to grow
She’d bind them up tight, but try as she might
She could not get her voice to stay low

One night out at sea, with the crew in their cups
A bet was proposed by O’Hare—
“Let’s whip our poles out,” the man he did shout
“And see who’s got inches to spare!”