Algebra Song! John Mulaney (Ft. André De Shields)

[ANDRÉ DE SHIELDS, spoken]
I'll sing a song about karmic wrath
How I lost my eye because I didn't know math!

[ANDRÉ DE SHIELDS, THE SACK LUNCH BUNCH]
I was born in Nola but then we had to flee
Police were searching everywhere for a fella named Daddy
I'm the child of a con man and a saintly mama
We fled for Chicago with nothin' but pajamas
If you don't see how algebra will save your eye
I'll tell you why, I'll tell you why
If you don't see how algebra will save your eye
Just keep listenin' and I'll tell you why
By age 13, I was weary of school
Thought doing your homework was the work of a fool
Drop out in a flash and, abracadabra
No more reading, no more algebra
There's a high on the world and he wanted to join
Throw the passion, fashion, cash an' coin
If you have pocket change, shake shake shake

[JOHN MULANEY, spoken]
I have coins up on the dresser

[ANDRÉ DE SHIELDS, THE SACK LUNCH BUNCH]
My principal was a hundred and four
Folks said she was a witch, hair down to the floor (Wa doo)
She cackled through a cigarette and said to me
"Not knowing algebra will change the way that you see!"