Song for Wossy Tim Minchin

Wossy, in two weeks you’ll be gone
This is my last opportunity to sing you a song
So I wanna ask a favour before you get on
With your life

Jonathan, I wanna make love to you-
Wossy, I just wanna make sweet love to you-
Just once, I wanna make sweet love to you-
Sweet love to your wife

There’s just something about her that drives me insane
She’s got that cute sense of humour and a brilliant brain
But if I’m totally honest, my feelings for Jane
Are mostly sexual

Don’t wanna put you and her in an awkward position
But I know I’d regret it If I didn’t ask the question
I have talked to my wife and she gave me permission
We both have a celebrity shag concession
And mine is Jane; hers is Wayne Rooney
Although to be fair, there’s not much chance of scoring there

Jane, in two weeks time
Your hubby will be out on the breadline, baby
And surely you’re not gonna wanna be spending time with a bum?
I know that in a month or three
He’ll have weaselled his way back onto my TV
But in the meantime, would you consider me for a little fun?