The Central Scrutinizer Frank Zappa

[Spoken: Central Scrutinizer]
This is the Central Scrutinizer
It is my responsibility to enforce all the laws
That haven't been passed yet
It is also my responsibility to alert each and every one of you
To the potential consequences
Of various ordinary everyday activities
You might be performing which could eventually lead to
The death penalty - or affect your parents' credit rating
Our criminal institutions are full of little creeps like you
Who do wrong things
And many of them were driven to these crimes
By a horrible force called "music"

Our studies have shown that this horrible force
Is so dangerous to society at large
That laws are being drawn up at this very moment
To stop it - forever!
Cruel and inhuman punishments
Are being carefully described in tiny paragraphs
So they won't conflict with the Constitution
Which, itself, is being modified
In order to accommodate the future
I bring you now a special presentation
To show what can happen to you
If you choose a career in music
The White Zone is for loading and unloading only
If you have to load or unload, go to the White Zone
You'll love it it's a way of life