Restless Legs Half Man Half Biscuit

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Here she lies in her fleecy gown
By my side in the eiderdown
But she can't get a ticket to Morningtown
'Cos I've got restless legs

Boring though this film may be
Slumber still won't visit thee
So long as you stay next to me
For I have restless legs

Milky drink and Sudafed
"That should sort you out", she said
As I kicked myself clean out of the bed
Grazed my restless legs

Homeopathic cures I've sought
All in all they've come to nought
I wish it was some astronaut
Who had these restless legs

Four o-six and I'm wide awake
I've got an uncontrollable urge to take
A five mile hike around the Ogwen Lake
Stretch these restless legs

No sympathy from Uncle Greg
Nor indeed from Aunty Meg
Well thank God I'm not Jake the Peg
With an extra restless leg