[Part 1]
Walked down the stairs still feeling murky
What can I smell? Christmas turkey
Roast potatoes, stuffing, Bailey's
Get me a pint of fucking gravy!
Now I'm wavy, I want beef
Who wants beef, cause I want beef
And when I want beef it's filet mignon
And if he wants beef I'll fill him in, John
The food is shit and the presents are whack
Thank God Zero brought me the strap
Now that is sick, thank god Zero brought me the stick
Cause it's the most wonderful time of the year
My Gran's not here and my mum's in tears
And my Aunty said to me: I swear you meant to be around your Dad's this year
This ain't no Christmas Carol
If I hear one then I'm switchin' channels
I ain't on no Jingle Bells, I'm on Camden Hells
And I'm drinking barrels
This ain't no deck the halls
It's a festive bar for the festivals
And now I can't see shit, I wish I had Santa for spectacles
It's not all glamour and glitz when your back in that Fitz, cause today is the one and tomorrow is tits
You can't remember how to roll spliffs, you get alcohol shits off the Aperol spritz
Cause it's the most wonderful time of the year
And tonight we're picking up big, fat, stinking bags and bags and bags and bags of Christmas cheer
Walked down the stairs still feeling murky
What can I smell? Christmas turkey
Roast potatoes, stuffing, Bailey's
Get me a pint of fucking gravy!
Now I'm wavy, I want beef
Who wants beef, cause I want beef
And when I want beef it's filet mignon
And if he wants beef I'll fill him in, John
The food is shit and the presents are whack
Thank God Zero brought me the strap
Now that is sick, thank god Zero brought me the stick
Cause it's the most wonderful time of the year
My Gran's not here and my mum's in tears
And my Aunty said to me: I swear you meant to be around your Dad's this year
This ain't no Christmas Carol
If I hear one then I'm switchin' channels
I ain't on no Jingle Bells, I'm on Camden Hells
And I'm drinking barrels
This ain't no deck the halls
It's a festive bar for the festivals
And now I can't see shit, I wish I had Santa for spectacles
It's not all glamour and glitz when your back in that Fitz, cause today is the one and tomorrow is tits
You can't remember how to roll spliffs, you get alcohol shits off the Aperol spritz
Cause it's the most wonderful time of the year
And tonight we're picking up big, fat, stinking bags and bags and bags and bags of Christmas cheer
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