Doctor Doctor (Have Mercy On Me) Ray Stevens

Doctor, doctor, have mercy on me (Have mercy on me)
(Have mercy)
Doctor, your cure is worse than my disease
You doctors, you get all the breaks
You get to bury your mistakes
Doctor, have mercy on me

Well, the cruelest thing that was ever invented
Came out of a mind that was truly demented
It's a little ol' thing they call the proctoscope
I said "a little ol' thing", that ain't exactly right
'Cause it's a three-foot piece of galvanized pipe
Make a sedentary middle-aged man out-jump an antelope
Heaven knows what goes on in their minds
Why, some of these doctors think they're divine
'Bout one half-step down from the man upstairs
They can't walk on water or part the sea
But I had one who separated me
From my gallbladder and every penny of money I made for the last six years

Doctor, doctor, have mercy on me (Have mercy on me)
(Have mercy)
Doctor, your cure is worse than my disease
The practice of medicine is a must
But must you always practice on us?
Doctor, have mercy on me