Little Gomez Eric Bogle

Oh, I used to have a doggie and I called him little Gomez
'cause he was a Mexican Chihuahua
There wasn't much to him but what there was was all cojones
He sure was a randy little fella
Large dogs, small dogs were all the same to him
The canine equivalent of Errol Flynn
At the drop of a sombrero he'd jump up and get stuck in
Taking Gomez out for walkies was embarassin'

I remember one day in the park his tally rose by four
An enviable score he was amassing
A pair of high-strung poodles and an Irish Labrador
And a [wombat|raccoon] who just happened to be passing
I tried every way to curb his carnal appetite
I kept him on a leash by day, I locked him up at night
I even put salt peter in his chunky meaty bites
But the only thing that might have worked was Kryptonite

Then came the fateful day when he tried to consummate
A liaison with a Saint Bernard from Dublin
And although he was quite clearly fighting well above his weight
He didn't let that minor detail stop him
He nearly pulled it off, oh, what an acrobat!
But the bitch got bored and down she sat
Well, they say that after making love you sometimes feel quite flat
I'm sure that little Gomez would agree with that