Lindsay Wins Achievement Hunter (Ft. Lindsay Jones)

[Jeff Goldblum]
That is one big pile of shit

Say my name, motherfucker, it’s Lindsay Jones!
Got a blood-covered bumper with the glistening chrome
Time to break some necks and pick some bones
Man-children at the office, plus kids at home? Shit!
No wonder why I‘ve lost my marbles
Now I got crack hands, flaring up my carpals
Step off, Larson, I‘m the one true marvel
Call me Sarah Connor- I can fuck up Arnold!

I‘m the queen of the cats, gonna rule this town
You can kiss my boots while you’re on the ground
You got your feet on the floor, but your head in the clouds
You can dream of beating me, but you won’t have my crown
I'm the chaotic goddess, on the track I reign
The meteorologist is forecasting pain
Coming in first place is my only plan, bitch
Michael, shut the fuck up and make me a sandwich

[gameplay audio]

[Jeff Goldblum]
That's the essence of chaos