My Neighbour’s Ass Tim Minchin

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My ass is getting me down
People laugh behind their hands when I take it into town
It used to be tough and hard-working and strong
But now it is greying and has long since been long past its prime
But it was such a good ass in its time

Just to rub salt in the wound
My neighbour has an ass that would make Tatanya swoon
It's so broad that it's almost impossible to straddle
He had to get a custom-made saddle

I know that envy's a sin
But his ass is so muscular while mine is so thin
I know it's immoral to covet
But just one day with his ass, oh, God, I would love it!

Oh, Lord, my saviour
Would you do me a favour?
I just want an ass like my neighbour

I want my neighbour's ass
'Cause my neighbour has
A real nice ass

I want my neighbour's ass
'Cause my neighbour has
A real nice ass