Something Bad is Happening Tracie Thoms & Betsy Wolfe

[CHARLOTTE]
People might think I'm very dyke-ish
I make a big stink when I must, but goddamn
I'm just professional, never too nonchalant
If I'm a bitch, well, I am what I am!

Just call me 'Doc', don't call me 'lady'
I don't like to talk when I'm losing the game
Bachelors arrive sick and frightened
They leave weeks later, unenlightened
We see a trend, but the trend has no name

Something bad is happening
Something very bad is happening
Something stinks, something immoral
Something so bad that words have lost their meaning
Rumors fly and tales abound
Stories echo underground
Something bad is
Spreading, spreading, spreading
'Round!

[CORDELIA]
Tell me how it tastes!
Tell me if it's good!
Tell me, dear, if you'd like seconds
[CHARLOTTE, spoken]
Stop!

[CORDELIA]
Go ahead and wound my pride

[CHARLOTTE]
Just stop

[CORDELIA]
You're feeling very sick inside, well, okay
So you've had a bad day
I don’t know what to say
Look what’s become of my doctor

She's my doctor
And I love her!
She's got passion!
She's intelligent and, Jesus Christ
A doctor!
Very wealthy
And I love her!
Doctor of Internal Medicine!
I'm heartsick
You’re unhappy