A Secretary Is Not a Toy Frank Loesser

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Gentlemen! Gentlemen, please!
When something of value is placed in your hands
You treat it maturely with infinite care
You don't make paper boats out of money
You don't toss a fine watch in the air
So you certainly should be aware

That a secretary is not a toy
No, my boy
Not a toy to fondle and dandle
And playfully handle
In search of some puerile joy
No, a secretary is not
Definitely not
A toy

A secretary is not to be
Used for play therapy
If that's what you'rе doing
You're quite misconstruing
Her function whilе in your employ
No, a secretary is not
Definitely not
A toy

She's a highly specialized
Key component of operational unity
A fine and sensitive mechanism
That serves the office community
With a mother at home she supports
(A mother at home she supports)