Mother Teresa vs. Sigmund Freud Epic Rap Battles of History (Ft. Cara Francis & Nice Peter)

[Intro]
EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY!
MOTHER TERESA!
VERSUS!
SIGMUND FREUD!
BEGIN!

[Mother Teresa]
Mother Teresa, for short, call me “M.T.”
I’m a missionary of charity M.C
Three stripes like Adidas, and I’m doing it for Jesus
A one woman nun-DMC
I got a peace prize, but I’m not friendly
You’re oh-for-thirteen as a nominee
I’ve got lines like the DMV
And being me takes balls, but I ain’t got no D envy!
Who could ask for a better adversary on the mic
Than the father of psychoanalysis? Psych!
Look at that egghead! Mama wants some omelettes
I’m here to crack the mind behind the mom-sex complex
I gave food, bed, medicine, and showers
To those whose flesh leprosy had devoured
Your legacy is people who are mad at their parents
Complaining on the couch for two hundred bucks an hour!

[Sigmund Freud]
Jokes I could make about your looks: abundant
Your chastity vow: redundant
But that’s enough about Mary B
Let’s turn to my favorite subject: me!
I got mouth cancer, wasn’t feeling so hot
Had the doc put me down with a morphine shot
Thank imaginary God I wasn’t in one of your beds
You’d have just sprinkled magic water on my forehead!
I help people live, you watch people die
To get souls for a man in the sky
You took credit that you didn’t deserve
You’re the fakest Sister Act since Whoopi Goldberg!
You were running Project Pimp the Projects
To you, Calcutta meant Cal-cutta a check
I can see right through you and you’ve got no flavor
I’m battling a communion wafer!