Anatole of Paris Danny Kaye

It all began when I was born a month too soon
My ma was frightened by a runaway saloon
Pa was forced to be a hobo
Because he played the oboe

And the oboe, it is clearly understood
Is an ill wind that no one blows good
I'll never forget the morning
That Grandpa ate the awning

To impress a pretty lady
Who went for men that were shady
Then my uncle Josia lit the Chicago fire

Ran off to Hawaii with the O'Leary cow
Which his loving wife resented
And there upon invented
A rolling pin that strikes and then says pow

And I'm the result of the twisted eugenics
Of this family of inbred schizophrenics
The end of a long long line of bats
I design women's hats

I'm Anatole of Paris
I shriek with chic, my hat of the week
'Cause 6 divorces, 3 runaway horses
I'm Anatole of Paris