Barely Hanging On Josh A

[Verse 1]
Feels like I'm barely hanging on
Every day feels like it's way too long
Don't know how to right so many wrongs
It's like there's no place where I belong
I been so miserable, manic, and all the above
Don't wanna get close 'cause I'll end up crushed
I'll make some progress and take a few steps
But one thing goes wrong and I'm back where I was
Four years sober, one death 'bout to push me over
I try to be strong for the ones that depend on me
But all this grieving been pulling me lower
I'm mad and I'm stressed, I don't want none of these thoughts in my head
I'm barely sleeping, man, I been a wreck
Thinking on things that I shoulda said
'Cause that wasn't you in that hospital bed
Never got to say goodbye
I just sit alone with these tears in my eyes
I would trade everything I have
I would give it all away if I could see you just one more time
Now I'm barely living, can't go through the motions
Tore me apart, right now I'm sitting here, broken
Can't even move, I'm just stuck and I'm frozen
Mind always racing, I'm losing my focus
How could I know, that the last time I saw you?
I didn't know I'd never see you again?
And now I feel so lost without you, It's so hard to live