[Verse 1]
Strap them kids in, give 'em a little bit of vodka
In a Cherry Coke, we're goin' to Oklahoma
To the family reunion for the first time in years
It's up at Uncle Slayton's 'cause he's getting on in years
You know he no longer travels, but he's still pretty spry
He's not much on talking, he's just too mean to die
And they'll be comin' down from Kansas and from west Arkansas
It'll be one great big ol' party like you never saw
[Verse 2]
Uncle Slayton's got his Texan pride
Back in the thickets with his Asian bride
He's got an Airstream trailer and a Holstein cow
He still makes whiskey 'cause he still knows how
He plays that Choctaw bingo every Friday night
You know he had to leave Texas, but he won't say why
He owns a quarter section up by Lake Eufala
Caught a great big ol' blue cat on a driftin' jug line
Sells his hardwood timber to the chipping mill
Cooks that crystal meth because the 'shine don't sell
He cooks that crystal meth because the 'shine don't sell
You know he likes that money, he don't mind the smell
[Verse 3]
My cousin Roscoe, Slayton's oldest boy
From his second marriage up in Illinois
He's raised in East St. Louis by his mama's people
Where they do things different thought he'd just come on down
He was going to Dallas, Texas, in a semi-truck
Called from that big McDonald's, you know the one that's built up
On that great big ol' bridge across the Will Rogers Turnpike
Took the Big Cabin exit, stopped and bought a carton o’ cigarettes
At that Indian smoke shop with the big neon smoke rings
In the Cherokee Nation hit Muskogee late that night
Somebody ran a stoplight at the Shawnee Bypass
Roscoe tried to miss 'em, but he didn't quite
Strap them kids in, give 'em a little bit of vodka
In a Cherry Coke, we're goin' to Oklahoma
To the family reunion for the first time in years
It's up at Uncle Slayton's 'cause he's getting on in years
You know he no longer travels, but he's still pretty spry
He's not much on talking, he's just too mean to die
And they'll be comin' down from Kansas and from west Arkansas
It'll be one great big ol' party like you never saw
[Verse 2]
Uncle Slayton's got his Texan pride
Back in the thickets with his Asian bride
He's got an Airstream trailer and a Holstein cow
He still makes whiskey 'cause he still knows how
He plays that Choctaw bingo every Friday night
You know he had to leave Texas, but he won't say why
He owns a quarter section up by Lake Eufala
Caught a great big ol' blue cat on a driftin' jug line
Sells his hardwood timber to the chipping mill
Cooks that crystal meth because the 'shine don't sell
He cooks that crystal meth because the 'shine don't sell
You know he likes that money, he don't mind the smell
[Verse 3]
My cousin Roscoe, Slayton's oldest boy
From his second marriage up in Illinois
He's raised in East St. Louis by his mama's people
Where they do things different thought he'd just come on down
He was going to Dallas, Texas, in a semi-truck
Called from that big McDonald's, you know the one that's built up
On that great big ol' bridge across the Will Rogers Turnpike
Took the Big Cabin exit, stopped and bought a carton o’ cigarettes
At that Indian smoke shop with the big neon smoke rings
In the Cherokee Nation hit Muskogee late that night
Somebody ran a stoplight at the Shawnee Bypass
Roscoe tried to miss 'em, but he didn't quite
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