I’m A Mason Now Jonathan Coulton

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[Verse 1]
You used to laugh at me when I drove a Shriner’s car
You said it’d never fly that I’d never get this far
I always knew that I would make it someday
Now you’d be safer staying out of my way

[Chorus]
Guess what I’m a Mason now
And you better take care if you want to stay
On the good side of the guy who’s
Got the secret handshake down

[Verse 2]
You think you’re pretty bad with your pretty trophy wife
You drive a pretty car through your polo trophy life
I got a robe and a pretty nice ring
You bet that brotherhood’s a wonderful thing

[Chorus]
Guess what I’m a Mason now
And you better take care if you want to stay
On the good side of the guy who’s
Got the secret handshake down

[Bridge]
Should we talk about the governments that I control?
Should we talk about the hands of fate, the dice they roll?
The secret things you’ll never see?
The secret man you’ll never be?
The secret rooms that have no windows?