Corgi Registered Friends Half Man Half Biscuit

In the kingdom of the blind
It's said the one-eyed man is king
And in the kingdom of the bland
It's nine o'clock on ITV
I believe I've seen holograms
With more substance than you
Automatic doors don't open for you

C-O-R-G-I (CORGI registered friends)
C-O-R-G-I (CORGI registered friends)
You meet up on a Monday with your
CORGI registered friends

You call Glastonbury "Glasto"
You'd like to go there one day
When they've put up the gun towers
To keep the hippies away
December sees Kitzbuehel
Clad in Lowe Alpine
Your children are painfully soulless
Ralph's in Brize Norton

C-O-R-G-I (CORGI registered friends)
C-O-R-G-I (CORGI registered friends)
You do Del Boy impressions with your
CORGI registered friends