Room For Improvement The Stupendium

[Verse 1]
It’s half eleven and your doorbell chimes
Yeah, I know I said I’d start at nine
But I had to grab a bap on the M25
Don’t worry, love, still gonna charge for the time
‘Cause I’m a jack of all tradesmen
And your place is craving renovation
Straight from the facias, down into your basement
'fraid your radiators need replacements
Greatest decorator in an eighth-mile radius
Don’t check my ratings, swear they’re outrageous
All their outrage is baseless, I’m blameless
Only three of my extensions evеr caved in
You got savings? Ooh, well I hope you do
‘Causе it’s a heck of a job that I’m quoting you
Look, I know that you only want a coat of blue
But to be safe, I’d better run my dozer through
I could do it in a flash, in a jiffy, in a jot
But the trouble is, love, it’s coming up one o’clock
So I’ll have a spot of lunch then a cuppa then I’m off
And I’ll come back tomorrow, see if anything’s in stock
If I’ve got it in the van, that’s grand
If I haven’t then I gotta get the parts from Japan
They should be here in Jan', maybe June, in a year, maybe two
But I’ll take the down payment now, see you soon