Epic Rap Battle: Nerd vs. Geek Rhett and Link

[Nerd]
Yes, I am a nerd; bookworm, I’m studious
From my cerebral cortex to my gluteus
Back in kindergarten, I aced my college entrance exam
Now, I’m no rocket scientist — oh, wait, I am
When I pour my Alpha-bits, I get nothing but straight A’s
My retainer and headgear connect to a back brace
I've got a pocket-protector protector protector
I broke my glasses on purpose so I could tape ‘em together
Run back to Reddit and type stuff no one will see
You’re a geek, that means you’re just a hipster wannabe

[Geek]
That’s right, I’m a geek; I’ve got brains and a personality
I wear my glasses sincerely and my T-shirts ironically
There’re some things you can’t learn in a class
Or else I’d sign you up for “Intro to How Not to Be a Social Outcast”
You’re just so early 2013
I was the cool form of uncool before uncool became a thing
I use an app to pair pork with the perfect Bordeaux
Too bad there’s no app to neutralize your B.O
While you’re lost in Second Life letting your fingernails grow long
I’ll be syncing up my iPhone, tablet, TV, and your mom

[Nerd]
Sure, grooming’s not my thing, but I don’t care
I look so good in chainmail that it’s not Renaissance Faire