RHODONITE AND GRIEF La Dispute

[Verse 1]
Lifetimes lived and died
For a moment in the turnaround
I was waiting with the car in drive
Watched you hurry on across the parking lot
The image of your life in your mind fades and
I could see an anxious strength in you
A bravery born in pain
Waiting by the front door on your cell phone
Summer at the convalescent home

[Chorus]
"Kill me by surprise"
You said
"I don't want to stay alive to watch the words go first like hers"
Lifetimes
Lived and died
Lifetimes
Lived and died

[Verse 2]
In the winter on the porch
Through the window of the door
I watch
In the kitchen with your notebook open
Frozen in the cold when I'd come back with wine
At the end of every long night
Take a moment you need to just breathe
Whole days in treatment plants
Aphasic patients
Apraxia of speech
Weeks and months go by like this
We function on routines
We sleep
We eat
We read
We eat
We drink
We sleep
We keep her picture on the fridge
I keep a rabbit toy for kids
You gave me strength to fix myself
I gave you tokens
Toys and gifts
To help you grieve