The Naval Medley Monty Python

(Men)
Isn't it awfully nice to have a penis?
And isn't it frightfully good to have a dong?
It's swell to have a stiffy
It's divine to own a dick
From the tiniest little tadger
To the world's biggest prick
So, three cheers for your Willy or John Thomas
Hooray for your one-eyed trouser snake
Your piece of pork, your wife's best friend
Your Percy, or your cock
You can wrap it up in ribbons
You can slip it in your sock
But don't take it out in public
Or they will stick you in the dock
And you won't come back

(Women)
It's fun to own your own vagina
It's great to have your friendly thatch
Your minge, your twat, your kitty cat
Your nest, your nasty or your snatch
It's great to have a monkey furrow
Your finger pie, your lunchbox or your catch
Your cameltoe, your bearded clam
Your bottom at the front
Your monkey minge
Your muffin
Or your old Sir Berkely Hunt
Your honeypot, your hairy friend
But never call it "cunt"
Or we won't come back