[Naration:]
In the center of the caverns of hell, hidden under layers of evil that have thrived for centuries, sits the morbid domain of the prince of the power of the air. Suddenly, a scaly creature disrupts Satan's ghastly existence with an urgent message. It reads, "Code red problem, conference needed, disaster forecasted!" With a disgusted annoyance, this general of evil agrees to confer with his chief demon lieutenant. This is the story of that encounter
[Dramatization:]
Satan: You may enter
Demon: My Lord Satan
Satan: State your business and make it fast
Demon: Sir, we're having problems of cataclysmic proportions
Satan: Where?
Demon: In the east sector, sir. The damage is vast
Satan: Is there something wrong with my abortion clinics?
Demon: No, sir, that's all fine. We kill 4,000 unborn a day through, shall we say, surgical removal. It's selective breeding. We eliminate human life in the name of convenience like the Nazis and the Jews and with the government's approval
Satan: Is there a problem with my pet project, television violence?
Demon: Sir, it's covered, from videos to cartoons. By the time a child graduates high school, he's seen 70,000 murders
Satan: Is this effective enough?
Demon: Sir, just watch the news
Satan: Is there a disturbance in my false religions?
Demon: No sir, business is booming. Over 40 million are into New Age and Zen. Over 45 million believe in astrology
Satan: Looks like we're catching up
Demon: Yes, sir. Only 50 million claim to be born again
Satan: Is there a problem with business in general?
Demon: Sir, we're showing tremendous progress. Teenage runaways, each year a million or more. There's a teen suicide every ninety minutes and your specialty, drunk driving, will claim more lives this year that the whole Vietnam war
In the center of the caverns of hell, hidden under layers of evil that have thrived for centuries, sits the morbid domain of the prince of the power of the air. Suddenly, a scaly creature disrupts Satan's ghastly existence with an urgent message. It reads, "Code red problem, conference needed, disaster forecasted!" With a disgusted annoyance, this general of evil agrees to confer with his chief demon lieutenant. This is the story of that encounter
[Dramatization:]
Satan: You may enter
Demon: My Lord Satan
Satan: State your business and make it fast
Demon: Sir, we're having problems of cataclysmic proportions
Satan: Where?
Demon: In the east sector, sir. The damage is vast
Satan: Is there something wrong with my abortion clinics?
Demon: No, sir, that's all fine. We kill 4,000 unborn a day through, shall we say, surgical removal. It's selective breeding. We eliminate human life in the name of convenience like the Nazis and the Jews and with the government's approval
Satan: Is there a problem with my pet project, television violence?
Demon: Sir, it's covered, from videos to cartoons. By the time a child graduates high school, he's seen 70,000 murders
Satan: Is this effective enough?
Demon: Sir, just watch the news
Satan: Is there a disturbance in my false religions?
Demon: No sir, business is booming. Over 40 million are into New Age and Zen. Over 45 million believe in astrology
Satan: Looks like we're catching up
Demon: Yes, sir. Only 50 million claim to be born again
Satan: Is there a problem with business in general?
Demon: Sir, we're showing tremendous progress. Teenage runaways, each year a million or more. There's a teen suicide every ninety minutes and your specialty, drunk driving, will claim more lives this year that the whole Vietnam war
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